When I tell people I’m a Christian foster parent who specifically wants to take in LGBTQ youth, I usually get one of two reactions: confusion or outright hostility. How can a Christian specifically want LGBTQ kids? Isn’t that contradictory? Here’s what I tell them: I’ve seen what happens when faith-based agencies and foster homes prioritize…
What I Didn’t Say About the Foster Care Executive Order (And Why I Need To Say It Now)
This morning I wrote about the “Fostering the Future” executive order, comparing it to California’s existing programs. I deliberately kept that post politically neutral, focusing on the practical programs and resources available to foster youth aging out of the system. But I left something out. Something important. A facebook commenter called me out on it,…
Understanding Trump’s Foster Care Executive Order: What It Adds to California’s Existing Programs
Last week, President Trump signed an executive order called “Fostering the Future” with much fanfare in the White House. First Lady Melania Trump championed the initiative as a groundbreaking effort to help foster youth transition to adulthood. The press coverage was glowing. The ceremony was emotional. And as a foster parent with a daughter who’s…
When Good Intentions Meet Reality: Why Foster Parents Need to Meet Teens Where They Are
I’ve been mulling over a Facebook post I saw in a foster parent support group this week. A foster parent was venting about a difficult situation with a teen who had recently left their home. The details aren’t as important as the broader conversation it sparked—one that I think gets to the heart of a…
Your Foster Teen Isn’t ‘Lazy’ – Understanding Executive Dysfunction from Trauma
I need to tell you something that might save your placement: that “lazy” foster teen? Their probably not lazy at all. I know what it looks like. They can’t get out of bed in the morning. They leave their homework until the last minute (or don’t do it at all). Their room is a disaster….
The Rights Your Foster Teen Needs to Know (And Why You Need to Teach Them)
I need to talk about something that doesn’t get discussed enough in foster parent circles: Are you teaching your foster teen about their rights? Not just mentioning them in passing. Not just hanging a poster on the wall that nobody reads. I mean actually sitting down and going through the California Foster Youth Bill of…
Why Foster Teens Lie (And It’s Not What You Think)
Let’s talk about something that makes foster parents absolutely lose their minds: lying. Your foster teen looks you straight in the eye and tells you something you know isn’t true. Maybe it’s small – “I did my homework” when you can see the blank assignment sheet. Maybe its bigger – “I was at Sarah’s house”…
You Don’t Have to Be Perfect to Be What They Need
The first time I saw our case’s Level of Care (LOC) assessment, I hadn’t even filled it out myself. Based on conversations and observations, Our caseworker completed it on my behalf. When I read it, I wondered if I was doing enough. If I was enough. The checkboxes listed therapy, medications, IEPs, physical care, and…
Why… Why become a mom now?
Very early in my life, my doctor told me that my likelihood of having my children would be very slim. Adoption was always in my heart. Later, even as a single mom, I realized I could provide a loving, stable home for teens. Fostering teenagers, especially those who have faced trauma, is challenging but incredibly rewarding. It’s about seeing beyond behaviors and understanding the underlying hurt. Balancing a career while fostering is tough, but with a strong support system, it’s possible. The journey has its ups and downs, but the rewards far outweigh the challenges. I’m grateful for this opportunity.
Being a Christian Foster Mom to a Trans Kid
Navigating societal expectations as a Christian foster mom to a trans kid is challenging. My foster child didn’t choose to be trans to fit a box—he became trans because society imposes rigid gender norms. The most harmful message a child can hear is that they’re only perfect if they conform. My foster child carried a history of judgment and uncertainty when he came to live with me. It’s not about changing who he is; it’s about embracing him for exactly who he is. By fostering love and acceptance, I hope to help him heal and grow without fear or judgment.