Fostering Teens: Understanding the Challenges and Rewards

Being a foster parent to teens is both challenging and immensely rewarding. As of 2021, there are approximately 400,000 children in the U.S. foster care system, with a significant portion being teenagers between the ages of 13 and 18. Specifically, about 20% of these children are teenagers, meaning there are roughly 80,000 teens in the system​ (USAFacts)​​ (AdoptUSKids)​.

The Hard Facts

Finding homes for teens in foster care is notoriously difficult. Many people hesitate to foster teens due to misconceptions that they are inherently problematic. However, most of these youths have endured significant trauma, which can manifest as challenging behaviors. It’s crucial to understand that these behaviors are often coping mechanisms rather than signs of a bad attitude.

Mental Health and Suicide Rates

Foster teens face significant mental health challenges. They are more likely to suffer from anxiety, depression, and PTSD than their peers. Alarmingly, the suicide rate among foster teens is higher compared to non-foster teens. Approximately 30% of foster teens report having considered suicide, and about 18% have attempted it at least once​ (KIDS COUNT Data Center)​​ (AdoptUSKids)​.

Overcoming Misconceptions

One of the biggest barriers to fostering teens is the belief that they are too difficult to handle. However, understanding the root causes of these behaviors can help potential foster parents see the bigger picture. Here are some key points to consider:

  1. Trauma-Informed Care: Many teens in foster care have experienced significant trauma, such as abuse, neglect, or the loss of their birth families. This trauma can lead to behaviors that are misunderstood as mere defiance or attitude problems. By approaching these behaviors through a trauma-informed lens, foster parents can better understand and support their foster teens​ (AdoptUSKids)​.
  2. Behavior as Communication: Teens often express their pain and confusion through their actions. What might appear as aggression or withdrawal can actually be a way of communicating unmet needs or unresolved trauma. Recognizing this helps in addressing the underlying issues rather than just the symptoms.
  3. Building Trust: Trust is a significant issue for foster teens. Many have experienced broken trust with adults in their lives, leading to difficulty in forming new, trusting relationships. Consistency, patience, and understanding are crucial in helping foster teens build trust and feel secure​ (AdoptUSKids)​​ (KIDS COUNT Data Center)​.
  4. Support Systems: Foster parents are not alone in this journey. There are numerous resources available, including counseling, support groups, and training on how to handle trauma-related behaviors. Utilizing these resources can make a significant difference in effectively supporting a foster teen​ (USAFacts)​​ (AdoptUSKids)​.
  5. Positive Reinforcement: Focusing on positive reinforcement rather than punishment can help foster teens feel valued and understood. Encouraging their strengths and providing opportunities for success can build their self-esteem and promote positive behaviors.

The Need for Families

Every year, more than 20,000 young people age out of the foster care system without a permanent family. These individuals often face poor outcomes, such as homelessness, low educational attainment, and unemployment. With a supportive family, these outcomes can be drastically improved. Teens in foster care are looking for stability, guidance, and a sense of belonging​ (AdoptUSKids)​​ (KIDS COUNT Data Center)​.

Why Foster Teens?

Fostering a teen can be incredibly rewarding. Teens are capable of forming deep, meaningful connections and can benefit immensely from having a supportive adult in their lives. By fostering a teen, you can provide them with the tools and support they need to transition into adulthood successfully.

If you’re considering fostering a teenager, remember that while the journey may be challenging, the impact you can make on a young person’s life is immeasurable. For more information and resources on fostering teens, you can visit organizations like AdoptUSKids and the Annie E. Casey Foundation.


Citations

  1. “Children in foster care by age group | KIDS COUNT Data Center.” Annie E. Casey Foundation. Link
  2. “How many kids are in foster care in the US?” USAFacts. Link
  3. “Teens need families – AdoptUSKids.” AdoptUSKids. Link